I love this time of year for all kinds of reasons. I love the busy, “back to school” energy (which is not to say that I don’t also love the mellower days of summer!), the vibrant colors, and the cooler temps.
But it’s also a deeply personal time… exactly 29 years ago this week (on October 26, 1996, to be exact), I facilitated my first SisterCircle — it was actually on the Taurus/Scorpio Full Moon which is coming up this year on November 5th. (I evolved into doing them on the New Moon in 2000, but that’s a story for another time.) I had just started working on my Master’s degree and was immersed in learning about the Divine Feminine and exploring Earth-centered spirituality… it felt like it was time to step fully into this new world and share my passion with others.
It was just 7 months after my Dad died and I was still feeling pretty tender (that’s him and me a few years before he died). I had learned that our modern-day “Halloween” is really just the most recent iteration of a sacred, ancient tradition of welcoming back our deceased loved ones when the veil between the worlds of the living and the dead is considred the thinnest. This powerful hinge on the Wheel of the Year is celebrated all over the world as a time honor our ancestors and loved ones who’ve passed to the other side. What poignant synchronicity that my very first SisterCircle was one where I could celebrate my Dad. He’s been with me in the dozens of ancestor-honoring rituals I’ve led ever since then.
Celebrating loved ones this year
This year for the first time, I’ve brought another beloved person in to my various ancestor/loved ones rituals — my college roommate, Okhee, who died in August. I wrote about her in my September Deb’s Picks and celebrated her in our annual Rememberance Service at 4thU on October 26th. (You can read/watch more about her on those links.) I’ll include her again in our Scorpio New Moon SisterCircle on November 19th as well.
But I’ve also come to understand that the realm of the ancestors is even deeper and more expansive than I realized. I’ve mentioned only briefly in past newsletters that I’ve been guided in some very powerful sacred medicine journeys over the last year or so. In the second one, I had a profound experience of being welcomed into a circle of wisewomen elders who identified themselves as my “abuela ancestor lineage”.
[OK… I have to stop here and just say that this is really the first time I’m sharing this publicly, so I have to keep breathing!!]
Here’s how it unfolded…
My Abuela Ancestor lineage
As I went deeper and deeper into the medicine, I kept saying “I remember, I remember“ then heard a clear message to embrace my wisdom, my crone-hood, and ultimately, my…”Abuela Ancestor Wisdom”! It felt like this was a community I had once been a part of, but had been separated from, and they have been wating for me to return. It was such a feeling of loving acceptance and joyful reunion. And since then, I’ve continured to have a strong sense of a being part of this lineage of Abuela Ancestors who have my back. I check in with them every day — my journal is now full of lovely little nuggets I’ve received from them. I’m not sure what I’ll do with them yet, if anything, but happy to share with anyone who’s interested.
Of course, my first question when I emerged from the journey was, “why Abuela”?? To my knowledge (and later confirmed by my brother who’s the family geneologist), I don’t have any Spanish, Mexican or Latina ancestors. So I started researching and had a few sessions with some wise intuitive counselors, including some Latina ones.
What I’ve come to understand is that we have “blood ancestors” (those whose DNA we share, going back generations upon generations) as well as “spiritual ancestors” — those who we’ve shared past life-times with, or connected in different realms.
Pretty far our stuff, but that seems to be the journey I’m now on and it feels right.
How does all this resonate with you?? Have you ever had the sense that you were connected to a community or lineage beyond your known ancestry?
I’ve only given you the tiniest sliver of my Abuela Ancestor experience but I couldn’t move through this powerful time of year and not acknowledge this newest path on my Ancestry exploration.
Taurus/Scorpio Full Moon this week
All that said, I won’t be offering a Taurus/Scorpio Full Moon TeleMeditation on November 5th since I’ll be in DisneyWorld with my granddaughters (woo-hoo!) But I encourage you to sit quietly at some point during the day and embrace the qualities of the earthy, grounded Taurus Moon and the deep transformative energy of this Scorpio season we’re moving through. You can listen to my meditation from last year if you like to fully embody it’s light.
(And I’d love you to join me for my upcoming Scorpio New Moon SisterCircle through the Wellness Universe on Wed., November 19th when we actually will be creating our own Ancestor-honoring ritual! Hope to see you then.
METAPHYSICAL CENTER OF NJ (MCNJ)
I mentioned last month that I was presenting this talk and I have to say, it really was powerful for all of us. I’ve been teaching and speaking about the spiritual history of Halloween for decades and it’s different every time, depending on who’s in the circle or in the audience. The MCNJ is a wonderful group and even if you’re not in New Jersey, you should consider checking them out since they live-stream most of their events. The first half of the talk was an overview of the ancestor-honoring origins of Halloween and in the 2nd half we created a ritual together that was lovely and meaningful. You can click HERE to experience it for yourself.
2021 DEB’S PICKS on GRIEF
You really can’t talk about honoring our ancestors and loved ones who have died without talking about grief. I learned early on to always have a box of tissues handy when we do our ancestor-honoring rituals this time of year. The death of my 21-year-old nephew in May of 2021 devastated our family and I wrote a tribute to him in my Deb’s Picks at that time. I also included some of the grieving resources I discovered, and actually have had organizations reach out to me since then to request that I include theirs as well. Please do click in the link if you’d like to explore those resources yourself.
SACRED GUT PUNCH PODCASTS ON GRIEVING
I’m sure it’s no surprise to hear that Max’s parents, my brother Jeff and sister-in-law, Lara, have been some of my most powerful teachers on grieving. In that tribute I wrote about Max in 2021, I mentioned that I had just started my training in Postive Intelligence coaching and one of the things they taught was to look for the “gift or opportunity” in every situation. But they also acknowledged that with grief, that may not be possible until years later. And while we certainly would rather have Max with us, the lessons he taught us in his life and death have been profound. Jeff and Lara talk about that so eloquently in their separate interviews with their dear friend, Dr. Tomi Bryan. Click on the link above and scroll down to Septembe 5th and 26th to hear their remarkable stories.
DEB’S YOUTUBE VIDEO ON SAMHAIN
This is one of those “oldies but goodies” (can you tell by the hairstyle?!) I recorded this video 12 years ago, so the dates may be a little off, but the information is timeless. It’s just 6 minutes and really does capture lots of the meaning and symbolism of this powerful Earth holy-day. And if you go to my YouTube channel, you can search for others on Halloween and Samhain as it relates to goddesses connected with this time of year — includiing the one I just posted this week on the Philippine goddess of the underworld, Mebu’yan.
THE STILL WOMEN’S LABYRINTH EXPERIENCE w/JOYELY’s FOUNDER SHERYL LYNN
I have to include this, even though it’s not directly connected to ancestor-honoring (tho I can hear your ancestors urging you to go)! Sheryl is now a beloved friend as well as a powerful teacher and facilitator, and her latest offering will take you to depths of healing in other ways. I’ve written here often about my immersion in the world of JOY Intelligence™ — you can check those out at HERE, HERE and HERE for a sampling. The STILL Experience brings all of the powerful work of JOYELY® and it’s brilliant, inspiring founder, into a beautiful immersive retreat experience for women. Sheryl is hosting four 1 1/2-day experiences in Las Vegas in November and December in a beautiful private setting and it promises to be a completely a nurturing, empowering experience. DEFINITELY click on the image to learn more
I hope some of these Picks have inspired you to create your own ancestor ritual this year (or to join me on the Scorpio New Moon on Nov. 19th!) and to reflect on the legacy you want to leave behind. And as always, if you’ve got any other Soul-full events or resources to share, I’d love to hear them!
With deep Fall blessings,
Deborah